Permission to Breathe…

You know what’s awesome?  This summer.  Maybe it’s just because the kids are older and have gotten more fun (babies are great, but kind of boring… just saying).  I think it’s also because I’ve taken the pressure off of myself by putting away the To Do lists and anything else that I felt was overwhelming me. The result is that a lot of things haven’t necessarily gotten done, but I feel more relaxed and have been enjoying my free time more.  Whereas before I felt rushed because I had to do such and such, lately I’ve just been playing it by ear and don’t feel as pressured to get something done.  Already I feel like my motivation is coming back and like I actually want to tackle my To Do list, and have in fact done so.

It seems silly that I needed to give myself permission to take a step back not only from adult responsibility, but also from things that give me joy.  I think I had too many things I was trying to give time to, though, and in turn they stopped being fun.  I like pulling out my camera and taking photos (good or bad), but lately I haven’t even much felt like doing that and one thing I’d like to do is make time for that hobby so I can become better at it.  I love learning about essential oils, but even that started to feel overwhelming with so much going on this summer.  I could go on, but I won’t.

Instead of doing the many things on my to-do list (including ordering updated kiddo photos… whoops), we have rearranged the house making it much more enjoyable, but I’ve also been reading A LOT more and wasting time binge watching a bunch of shows.  It’s thoroughly enjoyable and relaxing.  This much needed break has given me lots of time to reflect and dream and plan and be inspired, and now I just need all the thoughts in my brain to settle and organize themselves and then take action.

Thankfully kids are experts when it comes to shirking adult responsibility, so we’ve also been doing some Pony rehab lately.  Phoebe and I have a growing collection and some need more cleanup than others when they’re added to the herd.  I have zero shame that I’m a Pony nerd, and love that Phoebe often picks out a different one each night to briefly play with. What can I say? They make me happy. 😉

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