Turning 35

Tomorrow I turn 35.  The end.

It’s not exactly a milestone year, but it has definitely been on my mind and as I get closer to 40 (!!!!) it makes me get a little existential and if I’m not careful can lead to a certain amount of anxiety.  No one really wants to think about their mortality, do they?  While I’m not on my deathbed by any means and I’m not having a mid-life crisis… exactly, I am certainly becoming more aware that my time on earth is finite and I have not reached my fullest potential and while I may not know what that is… the clock is ticking. How much more time do I spend just casually strolling through my life?  I feel like I’m window shopping and I keep looking at all these amazing items in store windows and either lusting over them or telling myself that I can’t have them because of reason a, b or c.  I am excellent at making excuses and hiding behind fear and quite frankly I feel like I’ve wasted a lot of time. Not all of it, of course!  I’m just becoming more aware that I’ve spent a lot of time walking away from the edge rather than just leaping and putting faith in the universe/my abilities.  So… 35 is going to be different. Lots of changes… I hope in store.

Okay, enough of that. Here is a picture of a lamp I bought recently.

Who knew a little table lamp would make such a big difference in our living room?  I can even read on the couch at night again!  Ha!  Finally an impulse Target buy that was truly really worthwhile.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

August Blogging Challenge – Day 1

I was inspired by another blogger to take on a challenge for August. For better or for worse, I’m going to blog every single day.  Okay, maybe not weekends… we’ll see.  Regardless, that’s still a lot of days, and more than I typically do, so a challenge it is.  Why do this, considering not many people even read this blog?  It’s more for myself.  Maybe I’m hoping that by forcing myself to do something even when I feel like I have nothing to say it will maybe give me some kind of motivation to tackle some other things.

Lately I’ve been feeling like I need to re-evaluate a lot of things and really look at my priorities and where they are right now vs. what they should be/need to be.  At the moment I only have so much time in a day and I’m often torn during the hours that are considered “free” on how to best spend that time.  I think that is the hardest part of parenting, to be honest. There are many times when I really, really want to just sit down with a book, but I’m being pulled in different directions to do other things that, let’s just be honest, aren’t necessarily what I want to do, but my kids do.  One day I’m going to make certain I have more time with my kids so that in turn I have more time for myself as well.  One day, I will be able to drive my kids to school and pick them up in the afternoon and spend the majority of the summer with them rather than them being in day care. One day I’m going to do something that makes me feel fulfilled and proud.